Grandma and Jacob found Matt in the kitchen standing in the doorway with a yardstick.
He was stretching and groaning.

"Grandma, isn't it time to measure me again?", asked Matt.

Jacob in an aside whispered, "He's feeling vertically challenged; they want him to be an elf in the Christmas Pageant."

Grandma stifled a giggle. "The word is short, Jacob." Getting a pencil she went over to Matt.
"OK, now heels back, tummy in, shoulders squared and look straight ahead and no sneaking up on tippy toes."
She marked the doorway. "Well, you've grown about a smidgen."

Matt looked so sad. "I don't want to be an elf!"
"Well it's better than being the hind end of a reindeer, Matt," said Jacob.
"The teacher says the shortest kids will be elves. I want to grow tall!", cried Matt.

Grandma said, "There are good shorts. I can name one!" She assumed a pose and recited ...
"Martin Short is short
but he's a big star
and with talent
one can travel far."

"Oh no," said Jacob, "are you going to make us rhyme?"
"No, just give me something that's a good short!"
Matt called out, "shortcake!".
Jacob chimed in with short stop.
"Your turn, Matt", said Grandma.
"Mmmmmm, short shorts!"
"Oh, I've got a good one," added Jacob. "Short story!"

"Grandma, why can't I be tall like Jacob?" questioned Matt still a bit downcast.
"We are all programmed ... it's in our genes ... not the denim ones.
"Like a computer?", Matt asked Grandma.
"Well OK, we can go that way. But computers can be changed by special programs.
People must change their attitudes.
For example, Goliath was this very tall bully but who brought him down
by using his brain instead of brawn?"
"David!", cried the boys together.
"Exactly! And he was just a little guy but he stood tall and bravely and that's worth more
than being a few inches higher than someone else," she said gathering the boys to her and giving them a hug.


"Now what d'ya say we make some gingerbread man cookies?
"Could we make gingerbread elves?", giggled Jacob.
"JACOB!", shouted Matt! "You're making fun of me!"


Grandma stepped in ...
"He's not making fun of you
He wants to have some fun
So find an elf on the computer
And we'll get it done!"

The boys went to the computer and copies pictures of elves
while grandma got out the mixing bowl and various shaped cookie cutters.

"We like this one! And we want to make him a big elf gingerbread guy!"
Soon the kitchen was filled with the yummy smell and out of the oven on the baking sheets
came elves of all sizes and they all took turns with colored frosting to decorate the caps and turned up shoes.

Grandma had a front row seat at the Christmas Pageant and she'd taken the stuffing out of Matt's turned up elf shoes
so he was flat-footed and made the audience laugh and laugh because he kept trying to tackle the back end of the reindeer.
And Jacob didn't mind at all because he'd traded some of the gingerbread
with the boy who was supposed to be the reindeer's head ....
... and that's the long and short of that!

Well, not quite ... when all the children took their bows to great applause,
Matt tumbled across the stage and all the cast called out

"MERRY CHRISTMAS TO YOU!"

And may yours be merry and not too short!

© Connie Good
November 22, 2006

Dedicated to all grandmas and
the children they love!

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